Last week, Project Runway debuted on Lifetime. Before the new season began, the producers staged an All-Stars challenge. Daniel, of the orchid blouse fame, won. I thought his collection was subpar. Korto should have WON. While I was glad to see Sweet Pea in the final four just to counteract Uli's smugness (when did she become such a bitch?), Uli's clothes were better designed and constructed.
Korto's restaurant dress was pure amazingness. That's the dress I would have thrown an elbow into somebody's face for. My second favorite was Daniel's red carpet dress. It was the best thing in his collection, everything else was not interesting. First, his clothes looked chintzy. Second, only 20-year-old stick insects could possible pull off that exercise/bike messenger bullshit. I think that's why he won. His collection was all about serving it up to youth, and THAT'S still fashion's number one bias. Size is next, of course.
Considering that two of the judges are wizened bits of jerkey (DVF and Nina), and Kors is far, far, far from his days of spring and roses--it was sad to see them anoint Daniel as the winner. Ugh. Korto, my Korto---where in the world can a girl pick up your clothes line, because you ain't nothin' but fierce!
After that bitter beginning, the REAL Project Runway kicked off. They had to design a red carpet look for The Most Prominent Crackhead This Side Of The Atlantic. Christopher won with a cutesy yet smart dress. No problem with that decision. The two on the chopping block were Ari and Mitchell. Ari got the boot. Her clothes were ugh-worthy, but I think she really got kicked off because of her striking resemblance to The Most Prominent DJ Enabler This Side Of The Atlantic. Mitchell didn't finish his dress and basically sent his model down the runway in a sheer shift with a nifty collar.
I tried to watch the half-hour Models of Project Runway afterwards, but the immense stupidity or staggering vapidness sent me off to dreamland. I hope that piece of crap is available with Comcast On Demand. It's an extremely effective soporific, better than any Valium. There are a couple of shitty models who can't walk this season. You know, I don't think this show is necessary. These girls already get enough slobbering attention from modelizers. Let's not promote that an empty head is the epitome of female beauty. Seriously, none of these twits are disabusing the notion that models are S-T-U-P-I-D.
Last night's episode was infuriating. The designers had to dream up a maternity look for Rebecca Romijn. Shirin won with a lovely, thoughtful and compelling design. The waist detail and the elegant coat nailed it for her. The judges hit it on the money with that one. The two singled out for being the most wrong were Malvin and Mitchell (again). They sent Malvin and his literal egg idea out the door. Yack! What the f*#%! I didn't have a major problem with his sling thingy. OK, fashionistas might not want to rock it, but I can see a couple crunchy vegans rolling around town in it. It was a hell of a lot more interesting than Mitchell's boring t-shirt, shorts and stretchy cardigan (YAWN). On top of that, Mitchell's sewing is utter crap.
I'm ready for Mitchell to go. His designs don't sparkle, and his bitchy feyness is working my nerves. Especially when he's passive aggressively throwing shade towards designers with real talent. Stay away from him Ra'Mon. That bitch will undercut you at every turn. For some reason, I suspect Mitchell is a producers' favorite. Because they should have bounced his ass out of there last night. But, he's still there to annoy and offend the eyes next week.
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